Rudolphi's Burning: Bumper Stickers

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News From The Coffee Shop

April 15, 2013 8:27 AM

Bumper Stickers

♪ Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow ♪

Driving up and down the road I have observed motorists in minivans, pickup trucks, and little two door coupes, all proudly adorning their bumpers or back windows with stickers that exclaim how proud they are of their prized possessions.  You’ve all seen them…proud owners of guns, different breeds of dogs, various makes of automobiles (which in certain cases is either redundant or contradictory), tractors, boats…..You name it, if you can own it, I am willing to bet that somewhere there is a bumper sticker or window decal that will enable you to display your enthusiasm of doing so.  The pride of ownership in our society is simply HUGE.

To me, it appears that people display these “Proud owner” stickers for different reasons.  Some truly want to show their enthusiasm and use the stickers to reach out to other like minded motorists…making kind of a “Hey I’m with ya” statement.  (I get that).

Others display their pride purely to spite the opposition.  Gun owners for example, do not wave their flag to casually announce the love of their .357 magnum to the world; they display their window stickers with the intent of rubbing it in the anti-gun person’s face. (I get that too).

So I got to thinking to myself, what should my bumper sticker say?  I’ve never really been one to display my possessions or give away my position.  Typically, I prefer to keep my cards close to my vest and let people think what they will, because I really don’t care.  But in this case, I think it’s probably time to join the trend and display my bumper sticker.  I want something that will sympathize with like minded people, yet really put a burr under the saddle of folks who contrast from my view and position.  My bumper sticker will read…….I am the proud owner of OLD CROP CORN!

Now for you purists out there, (who pre-sold half of your crop for $8.20 and then marketed the rest in the week prior to the report) after you wake up from your fainting episode, catch your breath, and begin to come to grips with how this type of a travesty could possibly have taken place, I will explain to you the differences between you and I that have brought us to this point.

1.)     My brain is smaller than yours

2.)    My balls are bigger

For others, who are still holding a fair amount of old crop, I’m with ya!  I feel your pain.  I know what it’s like to chase Tums with Black Velvet.  Welcome to the OCOBBC….that’s the Old Crop Owners Big Balls Club.

For all of you proud card carrying club members, there are a few things to keep in mind.  There is a lot of time left on the clock—we have 5 months before new crop corn.  We are still in a very tight situation.  The credibility of the USDA is questionable at best.  While Chicago is going to react and use the USDA number as factual, end users won’t have that luxury.  Let the basis go to work!

♪ Oh the weather outside is frightful…..but to me it’s quite delightful  ♪

As we have seen in the last week, nothing will spark a market rally like a good old weather scare.  How about starting off the year with one?  A planting delay sounds just fine to me.  Bring on the snow…I hope we get a couple of feet, if so I’m going skiing, call me in May.

I understand that you are probably thinking that this is purely a one-track mind set.  You also probably want to come through the screen right now and strangle me for not joining the ranks of people begging and pleading for warm dry weather.  But to be honest, in the folks I have talked to, no one seems too concerned, nor do I think they have any reason to be.

Let’s look at the facts.  We know that the planting capacity of the Midwest is much larger than it really needs to be just in case of events like this.  Many producers are geared up to be able to plant their crop in a limited window.  In one week the lion’s share of the corn crop can be put in the ground.  Understanding that fact, we will get the crop in, so why not let Chicago panic a little bit here in the meantime?

Look back to the late starts in recent history, 2008, 2009, and even 2011 to a certain extent.  We came through all of those years in ok shape; there is no reason that this year should be any different.

No Excuses

From an agronomic standpoint, it is these types of years that really allow us to make progress in production.  There are no excuses because there are significantly less variables to contend with.  Look at last year…it became difficult to draw any meaningful conclusions because the planting window was so large.  I’ve talked to producers that had 7 weeks from start to finish.  With this, it was very difficult to conclude what the right solution was, and due to the summer that followed, I would say our “Knowledge Bank” grew very little last year because most producers are content to write it off as an anomaly and “throw it out.”

If we pay attention, a tight planting window can eliminate a huge amount of variables and we can truly begin to compare varieties, schemes, and management practices.  The nature of this spring could provide us with some great data for producing better crops in the coming years.

In addition, this weather does provide you the opportunity to take the time to go over your machinery with a fine-tooth comb and eliminate the potential hassles and failures that might show up in the field.  Take the next few weeks to tweak, tune, tinker, and get everything dialed in.  Watch it rain (or snow), cheer on the corn market, and get geared up to pop the clutch when the sun does finally decide to come out and stay. 

Somebody get me some water... cuz we got a fire!